The Worms

inspired by Charles Bukowski “Burning in water. Drowning in flame”

I sit among the worms

Telling myself: this world is upside down

And tomorrow
When I wake up
Everything that stinks and crawls inside of my head
Will die.

I sit and wait.
My heart is hanging from the mouth for so long
It has forgotten how to behave when the hunger begins and the sorrow eats you up. Just disturbing, you know…

The clock is ticking. The brain are jamming against my teeth, screaming “Let me out, you are broke, stupid and ugly! Like a paper cup of coffee, wet and empty. I don’t need you!”

I don’t need you.
I don’t need you…
I don’t need you!

I sing those words
For the first time in my life
While standing behind a curtain, hiding, smoking a cigar and thinking about my sad life, the Virgin Mary, and that old Ford.

Why? 
I aint a Sinatra.

Maybe because the world is
Unloved.
Suicidal.
Frightened…
By us.

I sit in the cold light
Wondering: how to end this bullshit
And also
How to get drunk and punch every ‘body’ I’ll meet today in the face
Make them burn, burn, burn…
Especially a postman,
And a dentist,
Ah, and of course that damn fly.
Because, well… they deserve it.

It’s sick, you know,
To die at 2 PM, with a beer
And the view of her warm ass on a flopping mattress, surrounded by cheap dreams, sweating, while fighting the sheets.

I wish I could kill them – the worms.
Or sell.
Or give as a gift.

But I see you got your own…

No light

No love
No hope
No laughter
Nothing to remember
Only the worms…

Thank God, none of them knows that I am still alive.

x x x 

P.S.  I know it is very ‘edgy’, but I just tried to copy the style of the book… Big thanks to Jerry for proofreading – Jerry and Beth Blog

Chapter 11 of “The Pearl Territory” (Ichi) will be posted tomorrow, it is written in “kvetching” style: means = I’m just sitting and writing on the paper everything that comes to my mind without any idea or thinking, then I’m creating a readable text from it. Here how it goes…

I still have to send it to proofread! 😂

Have a good day! 

 


Next post – “The Pearl Territory”, chapter 11, Ichi – private journal. 

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20 Responses

  1. I aint a Sinatra but I’m still singing…This is gorgeous.

  2. The worms never hurt anyone, unless they are tape worms or if you are already dead, then the worms crawl in and the worms crawl out, in your ears and out your mouth.

    • Victoria Ray NB says:

      Ouch, very visual 🙂 there’re different kinds of worms tho. Some r not that kind lol

  3. River Dixon says:

    This is really great!

  4. You amaze me with your prose and now your poems. This was so sophisticated and put an edge on edgy. Great stuff.

    • Victoria Ray NB says:

      Thank you :)) it was a very inspirational book, I guess✌️☕️📚 & cool you like it

  5. This is amazing! 💚💚

  6. This is really good – I used to read Bukowski in High Times magazine when I was a teenager.

    • Victoria Ray NB says:

      Thank you 🙂 tried to copy the style of his book I mentioned. And yes, he’s fun to read but very …dark/edgy.

  7. iScriblr says:

    This is really great!👏👏

  8. Was that your fluffy proofreader?

    Hey, that was a powerful write. Bravo.

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