The idea of serenity

“Life is a series of natural and spontaneous changes. Don’t resist them; that only creates sorrow. Let reality be reality. Let things flow naturally forward in whatever way they like.” Lao Tzu

Imagine being 100 years old and looking back on what was important. What would you have done differently? Now get back where you are… stop crying. Achieving inner harmony and self-acceptance is an effective way to look back with a smile.

Inner harmony – gladness – good mood or serenity. The dictionary would define it as the state of being calm, peaceful, and untroubled.

Two in the bed.
She: You are super flexible today, like a wet noodle…
He: Yeah, taking classes. In my yard. With a new neighbour.
She: I feel that. Is she a yoga teacher?
He: No, she is a psychiatrist at St John’s Behavioral Center.

Seneca defined “serenity” as:

  • believing in yourself
  • trusting that you are on the right path 

What does it mean for us? Simply, emotional well-being.
With the bustle of the world around us the idea of obtaining and maintaining ‘serenity’ feels out of reach at times. The world will keep trying to pull you away from Peace, Joy and Happiness, to push you into the troubles.

So, what to do, Ray?
How to achieve that damn S-thing?

‘Serenity’ or tranquility is something that has to come from within. Of course, outside forces can quell it, or can help us to obtain it, but what is really needed is the willingness to let go or, at least, see things differently. Think of ELASTIC BAND that can be twisted and stretched but always goes back to its more or less original shape.

Your original shape is ‘serenity’!

If you cultivate emotional well-being, you don’t have to resist feeling appropriate sadness, because you learn that your moods are ‘dynamic’ and they soon will return to the neutral balance point.

You are flexible!
Your moods are flexible!

And yes, you can learn how to stay in the zone of COMFORT, CONTENTMENT, SERENITY! Just like a child liking ice-cream, or a cow munching lush grass, or a dog lying in front of a fire… feel the satisfaction, feel that you carry it with you wherever you go. 

What is stopping you?
“Everything,” you’d say.

Think again. Pinpoint it, process it, and then eliminate its control over you.We must first let go of all the things that are getting in our way in order to have a contentment within yourself. Because to feel ‘serene’ is the one and only key of emotional well-being. It doesn’t mean being passive, it means that you understand (and recognize) that the source of human unhappiness is our never-ending desire to satisfy every need and a habit of comparing our experiences to others.

If you have trouble zoning in on what is blocking you from finding peace, write about it in a personal journal. As Roy T Bennett said, “Instead of worrying about what you cannot control, shift your energy to what you can create.” The simplicity of having a creative outlet will allow you to process and then let go of your troubles.

We have to learn to accept that life will not be perfect, no matter our efforts. In order to capture the very essence of serenity and find the ever elusive calm, we have to greet the chaos and decide that it is OKAY that the chaos exists.

 Accept what cannot be changed and then let go of it.

There is no short path to serenity… so just say “Ommmm” and be happy today (in your own way)! 😉✌️☕️

So that your own heart
Will grow.

Based on: “Spontaneous Happiness”, Dr. Andrew Weil, and Fale Hafiz’ poem

Next post – Book Review “Colder”, River Dixon 


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40 Responses

  1. Tom Darby says:

    Amazing…exactly what I was so poorly trying to say in two sentences yesterday, the most imprtant one being: ‘Believe in yourself and soon others will too.’ Thank you for spelling it out further and for the confirmation.

    • Victoria Ray NB says:

      Ray…a very helpful blog 🙂 haha 😂
      But if seriously it’s very true, the thing only that we often fail or drown in our doubts.

  2. lhpinhan says:

    Great post 👍

  3. Love this Ray!

  4. Ashleyhouck says:

    This post could not have come at a better time for me. I have been feeling so much anger and didn’t know why. I took a week to self reflect and feel that I have figured out the source of my strong emotion. I am finally ready to let go and go forward. Thank you so much for sharing this post!

    • Victoria Ray NB says:

      I’m very glad ✌️and also it’s true: it’s ok to feel anger or sadness but if you are willing to let go & move forward – you are already a winner & much closer to feeling/being emotionally well 😀☀️💙

  5. Ommmmmmmm. Thanks Victoria Ray. 🧘🏻‍♂️

  6. Baffledmum says:

    A great post! Much needed today as everything seems to be going wrong. I shall take a deep breath and allow some serenity into my life… X

    • Victoria Ray NB says:

      Perfect! 😉👍 we all need those calm peaceful moments in our lives 🙂 at least time to time …

  7. “Nothing is so aggravating as calmness.”
    ― Mahatma Gandhi

    Excellent positive post. I’ve been feeling low as of this morning and not the mention the rain. I needed this and I love it. 🙂

  8. kinkyacres says:

    <<>> How do you feel it, if you are always trying to achieve it?

    • Victoria Ray NB says:

      Even a one minute of serenity counts 😉😬 and don’t tell me u never felt it lol 😂

  9. I love the Roy T Bennett quote “Instead of worrying about what you cannot control, shift your energy to what you can create.” I’m writing it down on my journal. Much needed post for me! 🙂

    • Victoria Ray NB says:

      Cool 🙂 I think it often helps – to shift our energy to what we want create! Glad it was *arrived-right-on-time* reminder 🙂

  10. doubledacres says:

    Wow! Just wow. To be so young and so talented. You never cease to amaze me. Thanks for sharing.

  11. Fiery says:

    Before I launch into my response lol, have you published this?

    It reads like you have, or if you haven’t- you definitely should.

    Serenity is more important than people imagine. It eludes me a lot of the time. I do try though.
    I love the idea that serenity and peace is our resting state, that that’s how we should always be and everything else can begin from there.
    But so many situations and people suffocate that state.
    It’s so important to find peace but it’s also incredibly difficult.
    I suppose the struggle and journey towards it enlightens and gets us there when the time is right.

    Loved this, in case you didn’t notice!!!

    • Victoria Ray NB says:

      No I didn’t publish it but I’m planning to publish a book (non-fiction, about emotional well-being) & there I’ll write about “serenity” again 🙂 and I totally agree with you: difficult to achieve but important to remember that this is who we truly are…

  12. Totally love your blog!…you have the best way for penetrating hearts. This post helped me a lot!😊

  13. daneelyunus says:

    Nice post

  14. dalenflynn says:

    Lovely post, very helpful for some of the tougher days

    • Victoria Ray NB says:

      Thanks, yep, it’s important to remember that our mood is like stretch, as well as our problems..

  15. Oh my touch by this post. this blew me away. Thank you for taking the time to share these write up through these words.

    These words are painted in truth, experience and perspective. I especially love how you started it and how you ended the write up. Beautifully written and as I read through again on each line I was amazed . Each word you used are true and reflective of my personal encounter with people

    This produced a smile on my tired face after a long day. You’re appreciated.

    You are welcome Mrs/Miss Victoria Ray

    Peace ✌and Love ❤

    • Victoria Ray NB says:

      Thank you a lot. I appreciate it, cool comment & glad it was interesting & helpful 💙💙

      • Thank you! I appreciate your thoughtful response.

        Such an awesome way of replying someone. Thanks. Again

        Also, I just posted:


        Would love to know your views. Love to see your contributions on it. I’m always excited for your comment. 🙂

        You are welcome

        Peace ✌and Love ❤

      • You are welcome

        Peace ✌and Love ❤

  16. ” serenity”; a temporary endeavour craving for a fine idea.

  17. InspiresN says:

    Such a refreshing post , enjoyed it!

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