Tagged: adult-humor

The Story of Harmless Bullet

Day 22 Evolution of Marriage /absurdist comedy/  Nothing is more terrifying than the sudden and unpredictable change, especially the loss of freedom. That’s why we are so frightened by marriage.  Everything around me went black for a moment. The pores all over my body – disturbed, spongy, sieve-like – gave a strange, long, quite loud noise when a six-foot rubber hose was taken out from the right sleeve of Ms....

The Story of Harmless Bullet

Day 14 One percent  /absurdist comedy/ I sat at the maple table and listened to the conversations at the bar. Despite the increasing attention and distrust of the saloon’s regulars, I found out that roughly 1 percent of Gunung Kinabalu owned 92 percent of the Kingdom’s wealth. The gap between the high-tech quarter and the rest of the land widened last year. Constant taxes, erosion of farmers’ rights, cost-cutting, and...

The Story of Harmless Bullet

Screw Quarter Day 13 /absurdist comedy/ I welcomed the first rays of sun with enthusiastic cheer. After a long trip – full of obstacles, spiritual slumber, and excessive heat – I felt like a bear, awake and moving in the direction of the dawning light.  We arrived at the east riverbank of Gunung Kinabalu, closer to the lunch. Three cars, one of which was a beautiful Bentley R-Type Continental from...

The Story of Harmless Bullet

Day 9 The Ark  /absurdist comedy/ When angry, count to four. When very angry, swear. My ex-wife, Martha, took the definition of angry to another level. When she realized where she was, she started to swing the raft, madly kicking the wood floor. Three muscular Hamilton sisters pressed Martha’s body against the wet boards, but she did not give up. She slipped out from under their fingers, grabbed Mr. Brahman-Carrado’s suitcase,...

The Story of Harmless Bullet

Day 8 The more, the merrier /absurdist comedy/ How do you find a way out when you are surrounded by madness? There’s no clear answer to this question unless you are prepared for tremendous actions. I wasn’t ready. My way ‘out’ was still the same – ‘in’ or ‘with’. Sweet Ms. Amblycorypha Oblongifolia, the Sobekneferu of my dreams, the one I saved from the dirty paws of Mr. Domination, in...

The Story of Harmless Bullet

/absurdist comedy/ Day 4 The Crime I was still clutching my favorite pillow between my legs when I got the feeling that something was wrong. The sense of the air being displaced, the excitement in my nerve endings, the wander of breathing in a solid mass of danger, the sound of thunder and lightning — all that had passed through me, surprising in its spontaneity. I didn’t want to believe I...