Book Review “Artemis”, Andy Weir

woman in futuristic suit sitting on railing looking at beautiful night sky, illustration painting

“Building a civilization is an ugly thing.” Andy Weir

I never read (or watched) “The Martian”, but because I’m trying to write a sci-fi story, I decided to spend some of my free time studying the genre. “Artemis” caught my eye because it:

  • Is short,
  • Has a minimalistic design,
  • Utilizes a nice font
  • Has lots of dialogues

What can I say about the book (in general)? Seems like the author figured it all out (pronounced with the voice of a boy from the movie “Just go with it”).

The book begins with a description of running outside of Artemis colony which resides on the moon. Very refreshing… so refreshing that I started to doubt if the book was for me (at least, this was the case during the first 5 pages). I became much happier though when I found out that the main character is a female (on page 11); before that, I thought she was a guy!

Yes, I was a bit disappointed. But in the relaxing atmosphere of Artemis, we got to know each other better and I decided that ‘Jazz & Company’ deserves a handful of kindness from Ray…

Attention! The name ‘Jazz’ doesn’t have any connection with music, so drop your hopes, music lovers.

In 5 words main character:

– is a criminal (smuggling forbidden stuff to the Moon)
– is a sex addict
– swears… a lot!
– a problematic child (has a bad relationship with her father)
– is honest (she follows the gentleman’s code in affairs she makes. That means she wants to make the moon a better place!)

We can’t judge the girl by five words only. She is quite boyish, right… and all she wants is to become rich, buy a huge house and eat well and just do Nada ffs, but – who doesn’t? That’s our ‘dreamland’ too.

RIGHT TO THE HEART, Andy!!!

Jazz grew up on Artemis and she knew about life on the Earth ONLY from the letters of Kelvin (dude she never met, but I’m sure if she’d ever meet him, she’d fuck his bones out. Hard Artemis way!)

About Artemis:
In the interview at the end of the book, Andy Weir said that at first, he created the world. The plot and heroes are ‘secondary’ products.
In my opinion, the world is the best part of his story. Because in my eyes, heroes (all of them) are lacking the human side. There are no relationships in this book. It doesn’t make me cry or laugh; but only wonder…

Ray is a very sensitive gal!
Next time better luck, Andy!

The book unites different countries – Kenya, Saudi Arabia, Brazil, Hong Kong and Russia. Quite a combination!
There’s no jail on the Moon. Justice represents one person only – called Rudy – who control crimes and bitches with a help of his hard fist and steel-muscles (and, yeah, Jazz would like to fuck him too, but she is too busy with saving Artemis from the bad guys).

Jail isn’t necessary, because Rudy can exile you to the Earth and that’s a much bigger problem if you grew up or were born on the Moon. Why? The answer is gravity. It’s terrible for bone and muscle development.

Everything on the Moon is business. Sex, tourism, the air they breathe, water… you name it.

Disaster! As always.

I love the creative side with the names:

  • Bubbles (station-cities): Shepard, Aldrin, Conrad and so on.
  • Gizmo – reminds me of the iPhone.
  • Slugs – money
  • Eva – tourism organization (for the tours outside)

Kind reminder from the author: do not go to Artemis if you are pregnant. You can’t gestate a baby in lunar gravity – it leads to birth defects.

Plot is simple:
Norwegian rich papa-billionaire hires a bad girl, Jazz, to destroy ‘harvesters’ which help produce the oxygen for the whole city. Norwegian papa is dreaming to sell his own oxygen, because he wants to make more money. It’s never enough. That’s how they roll on the Moon: they sell oxygen to you. I’d consider staying on the Earth because it’s still free. Clap your hands!

Shit is getting big.
Jazz is failing in the “Kill harvest” mission.
Papa is dead and yeah, that’s where the story starts…

The details I liked:

  1. The invention of reusable condoms by the Ukrainian scientist, who happened to be a great friend with Jazz. Also, because Jazz is a synonym to horny-Artemis-bunny, she is getting a first pack to try… for free!!! Lucky girl! Yeah, washing isn’t necessary. Just shake it off.
  2. Dialogue to enjoy:

Svoboda: I need someone to test it.
Jazz: and you think I’ve got the dick for the job?
Svoboda: I need to know how it feels for the woman.
Jazz: Why don’t you bang a girl and ask her yourself?
Svoboda: I don’t have a girlfriend and I’m terrible with women.
Jazz: There’re brothels all over here. High-end, low-end, whatever-you-want.
Svoboda: I need data from a woman who is having sex for fun…
Jazz: Careful. Choose your next words wisely.

  1. Letters with Kelvin. Letter-exchange starts when Jazz and Kelvin (a boy from the Earth) are only kids. Guess what? Poor Kelvin became a smuggler too.
  2. Humor. It’s cool, a bit harsh though – a mix between “Mark Manson and Albert Einstein.”
  3. The administration of Artemis is one person – Kenya’s minister of finance. She’s also the reason Artemis exist.

I didn’t like:

  1. The scientific part killed me. Like, literally. I didn’t know what the author was talking about and I knew I’ll never get it.
  2. Jazz is tough, but can’t fight. Don’t expect any fights. Her last name is Bashara. She’s a thief and a smuggler, not Bruce Lee.
  3. Nobody died at the end. I mean, that’s not fair, Andy. At least we could kill Svoboda or Rudy. We don’t need any justice-fist if the air is for sale.
  4. Extras – the economics of Artemis. I don’t know, 33,000 bucks to go to the Moon? Mmmm, I already can see the queue and it’s longer than the equator. Double the price, Andy. 
  5. Welding – after the book you’ll be a pro in this subject. I promise you.

The purpose of a writer is to keep civilization from destroying itself.”
Albert Camus

Only you can answer if Andy Weir succeeds or not.

Ah, and my last question to you, sci-fi readers: who’d like to try Ukrainian reusable condom? Because Svoboda is still waiting for feedback…

Rate: 3.5 – to be honest, I like and dislike this book EQUALLY.

Notes: I bought the book without reading the synopsis or pitch on the back. I edited the post, but then the girl who edited it completely changed my text (this part makes me mad), so I changed it back again! Hope you enjoyed.


Next post – Book Review “The Silent Dead”, Graham Smith 

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19 Responses

  1. chocobosage says:

    I enjoyed the book, but it’s nothing to write home about. The Martian is much the same really, the character has the same sense of humour and survival instinct.
    Though in that case he is alone on Mars, so he talks to himself mostly using doaries/videologs. Much science explaining too, though i think i enjoyed The Martian more. Mainly due to the characters on Earth and their efforts.
    (The movie is pretty good btw)

    • Victoria Ray NB says:

      Yes, at the end of Artemis the author shared chapter 1 (from Martian). It’s same narrative voice & writing style. Going to check the movie 🎥 but bcz it is only 1 actor I doubt I’ll survive more than 20 minutes…I’m very action addicted lol

    • Victoria Ray NB says:

      Thanks for sharing your opinion 🙂

  2. Nilzeitung says:

    Toll!!!!

  3. I’ve been thinking about reading this and the Martian – but your review makes me both *want* to read it and *not want* to read it! Haha, perfect!

    • Victoria Ray NB says:

      I heard “Martian” a bit better. But at the end of “Artemis-book” I saw a chapter from Martian (ch1) & it is written in similar style …I doubt I’ll read it. Artemis was enough for me 🙂
      But the books has a cool narrative voice, maybe you’ll like it.

  4. I got Artemis as a Christmas in a Black Friday sale. It’s ok just couldn’t really buy into what the main character was doing and why. People say the Martian was much better. And you are so right about the science stuff, not that interesting and bit over my head.

    • Victoria Ray NB says:

      Yes, agreed. I think the style of the writing & world on the Moon is fun, but some piece* is missing…ppl are like puppets, no real: no pain, no love, no nothing. And science 🧬…ah I almost wanted to drop it. Honestly, I didn’t read it lol 😂 I jumped over :))

    • Victoria Ray NB says:

      Yep, I read after that Martian was much better….

  5. What editor changes the text. Glad you changed it back. I hope this editor is no cost. I enjoyed the review. Thanks.

  6. Jerry laiche says:

    Thanx for the review. Saved me some money. Ever heard of Madeline Miller ‘s “Circe”, be interested in your opinion.

    • Victoria Ray NB says:

      Nope, never read “Circe”, I checked tho & it’s based on Greek mythology, right?

    • Victoria Ray NB says:

      I’ve seen your message but if u sent any email – I haven’t seen it yet. I’m checking emails twice a week only. To read. Anyway I’d prefer it on victoria.ohlsson@aol.com (in the future, if any questions).

  1. January 7, 2019

    […] Source: Book Review “Artemis”, Andy Weir – Victoria Ray […]

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