If you spend your time hoping someone will suffer the consequences for what they did to your heart, then you’re allowing them to hurt you a second time in your mind.
Shannon L. Alder
Do you remember my peaceful floating in the ocean of VS-beauties? Guess what. I’ve divorced yesterday. Feels like a death, I’ll tell ya. I had assumed that we were happy with Melinda/or Linda…
Of course I’ve got a physical shock! At least in the first 0,33 seconds. Eh!
How I picked up myself up after divorce? I didn’t, my dear. There was weeping more or less without stopping. For the whole 3 and half minutes. Aaaaaaaaa!
But then I saw the article in the local newspaper: What smart men do after divorce?
NOOOOO! NOT THIS!
They focus on the future and build a relationships with themselves!
Thats why I’ve decide to move to a monastery…and only there I finally understood “Nunthing is impossible“!
Instead of jumping into another serious relationship with a different Victoria’s Secret Model I’ll focus on my life-goals, mistakes and learning. The nuns told me they could help me to discover what is meaningful and what is not. And I believe them. Why? Because sex is actually a bigger part of my life now. When I was married, I didn’t feel particularly satisfied, more like in a Sahara Dessert. Now I have a drawer full of sexy colourful boxers and a new (very!!) bad nun each night.
Yesterday evening I’ve got an early Xmas-present, the book “Finding Your Element. How to discover your talents and passions and transform you life” by Ken Robinson. I personally don’t know Ken, but I guess he is my fan as well. The guy is writing he’ve figured out the formula of happiness.
“One way is to create time and space to be alone with yourself, to experience who you are when no-one else wants anything from you and the noise has stopped. Meditate, do mind mapping, write vision boards or try the automatic writing.” Ken Robinson
Frankly, I’m not very good at the noise-stopping aka meditating. Mind mapping and vision boards? No, thanks. I’m fkn getting lost between all the colours. So many images make me triple-ADHD. But to dig in in a huge supply of a soft mmmm soft paper and write the word or two – feels more comfortable.
So what do I like? Girls. You’ve asked for that, Ken. Enjoy!
What I don’t mind?
Food. A lot of food. And dont forget about the girls.
What I dislike doing?
Mmmm, wake up at 6 am and go work to the fffactory, for example.
I can change my mind tho if those factories are full of girls.
I feel very unique already. You?
I’m the only 1 from 80 billions of people, who doesnt like factories, loves girls (all parts) and dont mind a good healthy hamburger and room sharing with a naughty nun.
Let’s get back to Ken! “Finding your Element/Purpose means being open to new experiences and to exploring new paths and possibilities in yourself and in the world around you.”
Exactly what am doing. I feel like I’m seeing the light at the end of a tunnel already, and I’m only on page 30. Hm. Whats the rest of the book all about?
Jumping on the page 76. Why? Wanna access my Purpose-Path more quickly. I have no time for checking the test-links right now, so I’m going to answer the questions instead:
What do you enjoy? (really enjoy, dont mind and do not enjoy at all)
Creating a refrigerator from the scratch doesn’t feels like a very enjoyable process to me.
Romantic love – mmm, I dont mind!
Sexual attraction – Yeah. I’m probably “attractophile”. I’m attracted to anything from a warm cinnamon bun to Victorias Secrets Model.
Next page – 102. Yes, I can count! previous was 76, next 102!
So far the best read… Ken trying to answer our spititual questions like: What if I have no passion? (this is a good read for you, in case if you are a tone death sociopath + a rare psychopath with too many passions to handle). What if I love something I’m not good at? (to dress like a nun. Hm!) What if what I love is morally dubious? ( like making love to all 33 girls at once, same night, same hour, same minute). Who’s going to clean the toilet? (I’ll pass that one to you, my fans!)
The best is yet to come.
Chapter Five: “What makes you Happy?”
I’d advice you to jump to this chapter at once and skip all the pain of the reading.
“One of the paradoxes of our times is that on the whole, people seems less happy than 20-30 years ago in spite of rising levels of affluence over the same period… The more we’ve attained, the emptier we’ve become.”
When I’ve finished Chapter Five I felt a new rise of the depression inside of me. The World Health Organisation is predicting that by 2020 depression will be the second leading cause of death in the world, affecting 30 % of adults.
Aaaaaa! We are on the Peak of the Epidemy! I dont have so many beds at my cloister.
Reminder: all kinds of experiences can make you feel good for a short time, but happiness is a fundamental well-being. Or an internal state of mind. It doesnt mean you have to be constantly cheerful
A real happiness consist from 3 elements:
1. Positive emotions (what we feel)
2. Engagement (a kinda time-stopping moments)
3. Meaning (serving something that you believe is bigger than the Self)
But in one word – its all about your own behaviour: what you choose to do and how you choose to think/feel.
I’m choosing to feel happy! And by that I mean -> a tasty plate of spaghetti, watching stars while reading Aristotle on a ‘butt-table’ of my favourite nun, screaming the songs in the shower to my Hairy Hero…
My greatest gift. My genuine. My deep. My strong. My always up to the adventure. Nope. I didn’t mean my heart…and yes, I love animals.
Ken doesnt wanna leave us with a full glass, only with a half-empty. Why? Dont you see a fundamental truth in it? Even if the glass is full, theres always a space to fill it a bit more. So if you feel too comfy by seeing a full glass on your table – drink from it! And fill it again, while I’m checking all tests from the book/by one click/.
I’m Air, Gemini, Sanguine, ENFP (Extrovert-Intuitive-Feeling-Perceiving) and I have to work as a journalist, psychologist, social worker, teacher or writer.
Now I’m really sad. Where’s a “Monk” on the list??? I wanna be a Monk, Ken! A happy, sensitive, active, joyful Monk. I understand all the challenges of this profession. Especially after the divorce. But I do feel like I’ve found my Element in it. Being a monk make me jump with a joy every second. I’d like also to use the possibility and invite you to visit me here, in my cloister. Of course there’re restrictions: free entry for a females only, under 25yo.
How will you find it? My dear, it’s right around the corner, look for the inscription on the wall: “When Luke is the only option”. Haha. Dont’ worry, it is safe here.
“Life is like eating an elephant; you need to do it one mouthful at the time.” African proverb
Living in Sweden/Born in USSR. Happy. Ayurvedic food. Healthy lifestyle. Dogs. Literature. Painting. Meditation/Yoga. I love my life.
"It does not matter how long you are spending on the earth, how much money you have gathered or how much attention you have received. It is the amount of positive vibration you have radiated in life that matters" A. Ray