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Coping

Some nights are made for torture, some for reflection, some for the savoring of loneliness, some for a fight. What’s your nights made for?..
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Sometimes I want to die. I really do. I plan it and I think about it all the time. I am obsessed with the idea of being anywhere but here. Getting to live a different life. This one, it feels so damn empty. I look for things to make me feel better, but they all so temporary and the emptiness comes back. It does not go for long. I wish I could see to a tomorrow. The days are getting so dark now. Facing my thoughts is a harder battle than I thought. I am grateful to communities like the artidote. I am grateful for support systems and counsellors. I am glad that I write. No matter what, I write. When it is out there, I never realised what that meant. I did not think that people would read and respond.  I feel a little less empty. I love words…

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Categories: psychology

raynotbradbury

Living in Sweden/Born in USSR. Happy. Ayurvedic food. Healthy lifestyle. Dogs. Literature. Painting. Meditation/Yoga. I love my life.
"It does not matter how long you are spending on the earth, how much money you have gathered or how much attention you have received. It is the amount of positive vibration you have radiated in life that matters" A. Ray

11 replies

  1. I think the one’s who find Happiness are the one’s who never make excuses..
    If it’s broken,They will fix it
    If it’s wrong,They will make it right
    Life isn’t a matter of milestones but of moments..

    Liked by 1 person

      1. I don’t know. I think happiness and being strong is a bit diff things tho.
        …it’s a long discussion: happiness:) we can’t fix it by talking here, ppl have to fix themselves.
        Being strong = to have a *core*, never bend under circumstances, never give up..etc

        Liked by 1 person

  2. I got lost trying to comment on YOUR blog while in the other one!!! Thank you for sharing it with those who follow you. I follow another blogging friend who feels all his world is online. I kind of get that. I have a great many online friends and few flesh and blood ones. Not saying those online are not flesh and blood, but I can’t touch them! I am always surprised when I find someone who actually READS my stuff! I can totally relate to the author above.

    Liked by 1 person

    1. Agreed with you…and I guess my mum would agree with you twice lol
      Yes, I’m sure a lot of ppl r reading what we r writing bcz:
      1. they need the ideas and sometimes they r stealing it from us 🙂 it’s normal & ok.
      2. they think they don’t have a life. they r totally lost inside of their imagination. Life goes by …and they loosing connection with it.
      I think real life is more fun than online. It’s ok to talk to ppl (we understand we r real), but the older I am – the more I appreciate my real life where I am now. Online is just for fun, kind of internet-diary (and it can talk, wow! great)) :))

      Liked by 1 person

  3. Maybe bcz she want to live a different life and saying this one too empty – she stimulate her depression. Not sure if there’s a place out there, called “different life”. We have to fix ourselves right where we r – inside

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