Life has a time limit.
And we are changing all the time.
So are our ambitions, desires and purposes…
The important thing is to find something
that never changes in you. Fumio Obata
Ok, let me open my long long long long (did I say ‘long”?) list of “the things that never changes in you”, Luke.
The most famous hormone of yours is Testosterone. If we could only find the way to use it as a fuel, we’d save the world.
We all know the face of your troubles, Luke. THAT and beer. Or I’d say: give him anything with THAT.
- Your boxers
Yes, I know you are very faithful. Lucky boxers. But all 365 days of the year?
- Status on Facebook
“A homeless millionaire. Tantric spirit. 33 inches bigger than average. Almost Dying. Fax your signature. From the bed and without bikini. Selfie is OK”.
- Toilet Paper Roll…
Ok, its gross. I’m not going so deep…
The rest of ‘8, 790, 345, 576, 690, 120 things about Luke’ I’ll read when we get back home. If we’ll get there…
So yes, folks, here we are… Still in Japan. Haiku-ing. Kind of.
First of all Luke tried to grow ‘YAEBA” (I cant even pronounce it, can you?). What does it mean? Double tooth.
Most adults have 32 teeth. But Luke decided to ‘double’ it (I never seen his teeth, so probably there’s nothing to ‘double’, but he still want it. Passionately lol)
YAEBA is a real, a bit bizarre trend among young girls and guys here, in the modern Japan: the teeth with a kind of crowded appearance. Just like mine lol (don’t tell Luke tho, he’ll die from the envy)
Next idea:Luke wanna be a businessman.
That is NOT why we are here, I told him…but he said the bj-s with a YAEBA-girl is on his new-year-resolutions list.
I hope she’ll suck it off. (is it possible? any cases? I have to check emergency rooms). I’d send a ‘thank-you-from-the-humanity-our-amazing-savior’ card to her. Hand-written.
What’s the kind of the business Luke wanna start? He wanna open ‘bra-area’. He thinks the idea of bras hanging around on the street would be very inviting to his no-bras-pub, dancing-bra-club, bra-shelter…(who knows exactly what it is. I don’t)
But then he found out that japanese aren’t into sex much, only into ‘watching of a fluid’ coming out. “Why they are not so interested?” – he asked me. Luke, dear…because they are studying hard – working hard – sleeping hard – no time for actions – only milliseconds to squeeze that fluid into the world.
Don’t be sad, Luke! You’ll get there too. One Day!
The next business – idea is a security-company to help to the older people (who can die any day) to die alone. I don’t know ‘how’, but Luke wanna organize it. He’d like to call it “The Lonely Deaths”. (Can you organize your table first???? yes, this one!)
One of the unfortunate side effects of maintaining such an elderly population (1 in 5 Japanese are over the age of 65, many of them 80-90 yo) is that people tend to die at home. These people often go undiscovered, sometimes for months or years! – a phenomenon known as “KODOKUSHI” = the lonely deaths. Thousands of cases occur in Japan each year, especially among men. Sometimes the bodies are left for so long that they self-mummify.
What, Luke? Planning to sell them? To the Hollywood? (He is just so FULL of ideas!)
It is estimated that in another 20 years, 1 in 3 Japanese will be senior-citizen. Thats why Luke thinks this is a good business start-up. (Yeah, I know…the guy thinks he can ‘THINK’).
Next business- idea – he’d like to buy the platform (a space) at the local train-station in Japan and rent it for those, who wanna jump under the train.
He is so sweeeeeeeeet, our Luke. Thank you, for helping people!
Japan has one of the highest rates of suicide in the world —in some cases MORE THAN TWICE than in other developed countries. Although attitudes are changing, suicide was for a long time accepted by the culture as a noble act-a way of protecting honor and defending the reputation of the family. One of the most ‘popular’ suicide trends involves leaping in front of commute trains.
Theres 1 more reason why Luke want to stay in Japan, he wanna help with a population-growth… It’s a never ending circle with you, Luke. We again got back to number #1 – Testosterone.
So what is never changes, Luke?
What? Time, taken by light to travel around the Earth’s equator? Do I look like I care?
I’m very serious! I mean in YOU?!
Hm….you dont know?
We are sitting on the streets of Japan,
naked and hungry,
singing mantras in swahili
japanese are laughing
because they think it’s a tv-show
and all you are saying:
You don’t know??!!
How about to check an S on your forehead?
Your next home-work ->>>”to FIND something that never changes in you” and simply because you belong to the group of ‘don’t know’ – I’ll help you, check a riddle-quote:
The most difficult door to open is the entrance to the Luke’s Mind.
You failed – your fart was not silent, my nose heard it’s deafening noise.
Aniekee Tochukwu Ezekiel
P.S. If you are new here and don’t know why are we in Japan, read the post: A reason to get up in the morning